It was with great fanfare that Satan’s offspring Eric Trump and Donald Trump Jr. announced on June 16, 2025 the launch of Trump Mobile and T1 Mobile, a “transformational” new cellular service designed to deliver “top-tier connectivity, unbeatable value, and all-American service for our nation’s hardest-working people.”The Trump boys made a lot of promises at launch. For $499 and $47.45 a month (get it?), it would supply a shimmering gold-plated (naturally) smartphone with a 6.78-inch screen for subscribers who would receive unlimited talk, text and data, 24/7 roadside assistance through Drive America, telehealth services, free international calling, and no contracts or credit check — cancel anytime! And fully MADE IN THE USA!They might have also added, “no actual phone,” as everyone who forked over the required $100 deposit is still phoneless some 11 months later.It wasn’t until later that the small print noted the deposit was non-refundable. Whoops. And that the rebranded Android phone was in fact mostly manufactured in China with final assembly in Florida, using components made abroad. This forced a marketing change to an “American-proud” design and a “with American values in mind” description. Why they even bothered when the phone itself may never actually materialize is unclear.Meanwhile, a reported 600,000 people who dutifully sent in their hundred bucks are out of luck. For their money down, they received a valuable lesson in terms and conditions.There may, in fact, never be a Trump Mobile device. It’s entirely possible there was never any intention to make one at all, potentially just another smoke-and-mirrors scam from the people who brought you Trump Vodka, Trump Steaks, Trump Mortgage, Trump University, Trump Magazine, Trump Water, Trump Watches, Trump: The Game, the Tour de Trump Bicycle Race, Trump Sneakers, the Trump Bible, and on and on.There is no end to the ways that the Trump Crime Family will swindle the gullible out of their hard-earned greenbacks. You may think I’m kidding when I say the disclaimer now maintains, “A deposit does not constitute a purchase, create a sales contract, reserve inventory, or guarantee the device will be produced or delivered.” They might as well just say, “It’s the first smartphone with a campaign slogan instead of an actual release date!”You talk about a sucker being born every minute. In the Trump era, it’s every second. But the fact that there are still souls who trust these cheats doesn’t mean they aren’t due the product they paid for.The customers who have been on the waitlist were initially told the phone was coming out last August. But it’s faced multiple delays, with revised shipping estimates moving to October 2025, December 2025, January 2026 and March 2026. Now we’re in May, and there is no hint of when, or if, the phones will surface — and certainly no discussion of refunds. Perish the thought.In fact, Trump and Sons have pocketed $59 million in literal chump change from the preorder deposits so far. That’s money the president can use to bet on the stock market, or invest in crypto, or take a bath in.So for the moment, all that people sitting at home with no Trump Mobile T1 to satisfy their communication needs have are jokes to keep them entertained, like:The battery life is incredible because no one’s been able to turn one on.It runs on Android, IOS, and perpetual disappointment.The launch has been delayed so many times that even the voicemail says, “We’ll circle back.”It’s the first phone whose most active feature is the preorder button.At this point, the Trump phone and the GOP healthcare plan should launch together.But seriously, if you go to the phone website (trumpmobile.com), the scamming grows even more specific. Here’s one gem: “Trump Mobile does not control and is not responsible for the availability, performance, content, or quality of Included Services. To the maximum extent permitted by law, Trump Mobile disclaims all liability arising from or related to your use of any Included Services.”Translation: We’re barely putting our name on this thing. Call China if you’ve got a problem, pal.It’s pretty much what we would expect to see from a brand that cares significantly more about promotion than quality. They slap the Trump name on things to generate cash without any concern for the unfortunate saps who buy the product or service, as those who enrolled at Trump U discovered the hard way.That’s the thing with all things Trump. No one has ever emerged from purchasing anything his poisonous handle has been associated with and thought, “Wow, that was SO worth it.” More often, it’s, “What the living hell was I thinking?”I’ll be surprised if the Trump phone ever actually surfaces. I’ll be even more shocked if anyone is ever reacquainted with their deposit. Trump is not in the habit of reimbursing or holding up his end of any deal.